


Unleashed

by wholetthedogdrive



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Derek/Stiles only if you squint, Ficlet, Fluff, M/M, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-17
Updated: 2013-09-17
Packaged: 2017-12-26 21:52:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/970674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wholetthedogdrive/pseuds/wholetthedogdrive





	Unleashed

**Author's Note:**

  * For [otter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/otter/gifts).



Derek’s been turned into a dog. Because OF COURSE he has. If there’s one thing that makes Stiles’ shitshow of a life even marginally acceptable, it’s that no matter what he does and how hard he fails, Derek is worse.

“What the everloving FUCK did you do?” Stiles asks. “Never mind. You’re a dog, you can’t talk. Can you? Whatever. Who’d you piss off this time? This is so much worse than that time you started singing.”

Derek looks at him. He’s got huge soulful brown eyes, with, yup, thick black eyebrows. The look is surprisingly effective, although not very useful.

“Did you eat some witch’s cat again? Also, why a dog? Why didn’t you just, you know, sort of….turn into a wolf?” Stiles can’t figure it out. These sorts of spells usually just bounce off. Or, well, there was that one time that he had green fur in his alpha form, for, like, a week, but that was mostly just funny. Because it was NEON.

Derek pointedly turns his back, curling one lip up.

“YOU DID! HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU TO STOP CHASING CATS!” Stiles can’t BELIEVE this. Once, fine. Once was just wolf instincts and something trespassing on his territory, if you could call the alley beside the loft “territory.” Twice, well. Twice perhaps hinted at a problem.

This? This was the sixth time. The SIXTH TIME! Stiles may yell this out loud. Derek just looks affronted. It’s magic how his eyebrows do that.

“Okay. I can handle this. Did you actually hurt it? Or just scare the shit out of it with your brooding emo eyes?” Right on cue, there’s a little MEEP from near the couch. Stiles drops down to crawl over, and yup, sure enough, there’s a tiny kitten backed all the way underneath. It appears to have its claws hooked into the wallpaper. It does not look pleased.

“Oh. Great. I’m gonna get clawed again, aren’t I? Where’d you put the oven mitts? Do we still have that welding mask?” Derek deigns to get up, looking back over his (brown! Stiles can’t get over the fact that Derek is FLUFFY!) shoulder to make sure Stiles follows.

\-------

Half an hour later, through a combination of surface wounds and tuna, Stiles has successfully retrieved the kitten.

It has a collar, so he takes a deep breath and calls the number. He doesn’t actually remember the conversation when it’s over. He’s good like that.

“So. This is how this is going to go down. I am going to take this cat back to Mrs. Benner, who, by the way, has done NOTHING to deserve this. She, in exchange, promises, so far as I haven’t blocked out the remainder of the conversation because of the SHEER HORROR of what she described to me, to lift what she calls her “mojo” from you. IF, and I emphasize, IF, and this is important, Derek, pay attention, you FUCKING QUIT CHASING HER CAT! Yes, I am aware that it is tiny and ferocious, and probably caused you great emotional MANGST by, hell knows, pissing on your porch or something, and maybe Mrs. Benner shouldn’t let her out or whatever, but, here, look, LOOK, point is, THE POINT IS, MRS. BENNER IS A WITCH AND NOW YOU’RE A DOG. SO LEARN A GODDAMNED LESSON, YOU NITWIT!”

To his credit, by the time Stiles has yelled the last of his rant directly into Derek’s face, he does look a bit abashed. Well, his ears are all the way back, and his tail is down, so Stiles will count this as a win.

Cradling the kitten in his arms, which basically means wrapping it in a hoodie so that he can maybe stop any fresh bleeding, he exits the house with as much dignity as he can. Which, frankly, isn’t much.

\-------

At least Mrs. Benner gives him cookies. Well, a cookie. It’s offset by the Bactine, but she only tells one story about her knee, so Stiles thinks that, overall, he’s on the plus side of the ledger. Until.

\-------

“DEREK!” Stiles yells, stomping up the stairs so hard his feet vibrate. “SHE SAID YOU PEED ON HER AIR CONDITIONER! I’M NEVER SLEEPING WITH YOU AGAIN!”


End file.
